söndag 23 februari 2014

A so called girls' night out



Now, first of all, I would like to point out that you don’t have to be a girlie girl to go on a so called girls’ night out. In fact, you don’t even have to be a girl. We don’t discriminate against penises (despite sometimes being discriminated against for lacking them). As long as you don’t spare any details about your dirty past and are happy to play drinking games, you’re in. And that’s how we included Junior in our Saturday night plans. 

When both the rugby games were over, the crowd thinned out. Only a couple of groups (one could call them generation X and generation Y) stayed to make sure the bar staff was kept busy. What better way to lure secrets from others than with wine and peer pressure? Some of them we chose to instantly forget (we don’t mind dirty, but we can do without outright mingin’), and to clear our minds we eventually decided to move on to another destination. Junior, being drunk and stupid, mentioned going home since he was too awkward to go out with his friends’ sisters and his captain’s wife. As people in general don’t like to be reduced to someone else’s sister or wife, this resulted in Junior being dragged along to a pub. And to a burger place. And home with the rest of us. Last I heard was that he’s now signing up for the ladies’ team instead.

And as the Sunday morning came creeping up on us girls in the bedroom*, I found myself in a very familiar position. On the flank, tired as hell and pressed against a sweaty front row arse. Just like during season.

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*Junior quickly volunteered for the sofa in the living room. I think he’d appreciate this info being here, just for the record. In other words, he was scared shitless for multiple reasons.

torsdag 6 februari 2014

The sacrifices we make

With a painful and throbbing big toe I now look back at yesterdays session. I slammed on a full stop to sneak round a defender and my new shoes wasn't up for the challenge. That try is gonna cost me a toe nail. Was it really worth a nail to be able to show off for some newbies? Well, if you can't outrun them at the Heinz Müllers...

Bleep test - check!



If you’ve ever been there you know what I’m talking about. In a gym hall a dark night, during pre-season, time just doesn’t exist. All there is, is a motivational soundtrack blaring from crappy speakers, squeaks from shoes touching the rubber floor and someone shouting: go! Rest! Go! in infinity.

It didn’t start that focused. The coach was missing and so were our rugby balls. We were debating who was gonna call and inquire of their whereabouts. I had JUST gotten used to the Scottish coach’s accent! said Nurse Brunette. And now I have to adjust my ears to something even worse. I’m not calling – I’ll never know what the Irishman says. But someone else did and the first indoor pre-season session could start. 

Ninety minutes later the Irishman was happy as us ladies lay panting on the floor, sweaty and aching (wait, that sounds…a bit dirty. Oh well). Some of us struggled to let go of the awkward feeling that comes with being back in their high school gym. (My ACTUAL high school gym. Walls were impregnated with my anxiety, pubertal hormones and bad memories.) Some of us were just happy to have done the bleep test without dying embarrassingly early on. The Irishman got the great idea to post the results on FB. Noone argued. Actually, we were too tired to talk.

Afterwards, the one part of my body that really gave me a hard time was my calves, after one (!) session with the skipping rope. Somehow I feel that’s a sort of failure. 

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24 hours later. Calves are fine. But my gluteus maximus are a pain in the arse. Literally.